Have you ever considered bagel nomenclature?
Well, have you?
I have. Multiple times, in fact.
And, in the process (after 33 or so orange popsicles), I came to some fascinating observations. First of all, other than your standard or “plain” bagel, you usually have your four or so standard types:

  1. The onion bagel, which has onions on it.
  2. The poppyseed bagel, which has poppyseeds on it.
  3. The sesame seed bagel, which has sesame seeds on it.
  4. The “everything” bagel, which has just onions, poppyseeds, and sesame seeds on it.

Don’t you think that last one should have….well, everything on it? I mean, not just seeds and onions, but also ground beef, a pack of angry bees, and the Queen of England? In fact, as my brother pointed out, if there were a correctly named everything bagel, there could only be one, since it would have everything in it.

And now for the philosophically-oriented part:
Our universe is big. Really, startlingly, mind-bogglingly big. But many scientists don’t believe it is infinitely large. And as such, the universe has a shape, or topology, as the mathemeticians and physicists would have it. So what shape is the universe, you ask? Well, one popular theory has it shaped like a single torus, which is shaped like a tire, or a donut…or a bagel.

Yes, my friends. The universe we live in may very well be one big “everything bagel.”

Oh, boy. I should’ve proabably stopped at my 32nd popsicle.

4 Responses to “Bagels”

  1. Chaim says:

    yes but that is a 3-D torus. the universe would have to be at least a 4-D torus….
    share popsicles? and bring me a puppy!!

  2. Eliyahu says:

    Ah, but would the “everything bagel” have itself on it?

  3. Rachel says:

    That…is brilliant.

  4. Yoni says:

    ha ha, the world is defenitely a multidimentional everything bagel! and there can be only one!

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